Feedback Report – Session One

07.05.206

Overall, you already have reasonably strong foundations in your body language, hand gestures, and vocal expression, and your energy certainly came to life during the session. I also think people are going to be impressed by the deep level of research behind the product, so really trusting your expertise and knowledge in that regard will be excellent. When you speak naturally, with confidence and connect to your interest and expertise, it comes across really well.

You come across as sensitive (able to read a room) and attuned when speaking, which makes you trustworthy as a speaker. You also took on the notes very well throughout the session. Your posture improved, and your use of hand gestures already became stronger and more intentional, so those are really positive foundations to build from.

Key Areas to Continue Developing

Filler Words

Continue working on reducing filler words, particularly “so” at the beginning of sentences. I recommend practising this in WhatsApp voice notes or casual conversations with friends. You can even let people know you’re consciously working on it.

Where possible, try to use connectives within sentences instead, such as:

• “Furthermore”

• “Therefore”

• “However”

Or simply deploy pause instead.

Don’t be frightened of silence. Pauses are powerful and often make you appear more thoughtful and composed.

Pace & Space

Ensure you slow your pace down slightly so that the points fully land for the audience. Remember, even though the information is highly familiar to you, it may be completely new to the audience and therefore take longer for them to process.

Slowing down and using space can:

• Build suspense

• Increase clarity

• Give important points more weight

• Buy you time to think about what you want to say next

You already have good vocal clarity, which is a really strong asset. Combining that clarity with slower pacing and stronger pauses will make the delivery even more impactful.

Emphasis

I think emphasis will come slightly later in the process once the script is more developed. At that stage, you can begin highlighting key words and phrases that need stronger emphasis or vocal lift.

That said, the foundations are already there.

Presentation Preparation for Next Session

The key priority for the next session is to really develop the presentation document you want to work with, whether that’s for:

• Public speaking

• Online presentation

The more material you have prepared, the more deeply I can coach the speaking itself within the session.

If possible, it would be particularly useful to have the introduction section strongly developed, as that will allow me to give you more detailed public speaking coaching around a specific section of the presentation.

If the wider presentation is also in a good working state, that will help us significantly as well.

Extra Video Feedback

As discussed, I’ll throw in an additional video review as part of the package and to acknowledge our date change and keep momentum.

Feel free to send over a short 60–90 second video recorded on your phone. Don’t worry about filming quality or setup. The important thing is simply getting the practice in. Perhaps send this 1 week before our next session, if possible?

I’d particularly recommend rehearsing the introduction more than any other section, as that is usually where nerves are highest and where confidence matters most. First impression is massive too.

Language & Trustworthiness

As mentioned in the session, ensure that any marketing language or company messaging is translated into your own authentic speaking voice.

Of course, the presentation still needs to align with the wider brand, but it’s very important that the audience feels the speech is genuinely coming from you.

People are not only investing in the product itself - they are also investing in:

• Your trustworthiness

• Your credibility

• Your sincerity

Avoid overloading the presentation with jargon. Remember, this is not a written report. Spoken communication benefits from:

• Direct language

• Clarity

• Simplicity

• Strong examples

Where necessary, translate complex concepts through:

• Analogy

• Simile

• Story

• Real-world examples

Cut straight to the core point wherever possible.

Speech Structure & Rhetorical Devices

Please refer to the speech structure document that I’ll attach via email so that you can clearly structure the presentation.

Within the introduction particularly, try to deploy the rhetorical devices we discussed.

Rule of Three

The rule of three is especially effective when:

• Creating lists

• Giving examples

• Building rhythm

• Building suspense

For example:
“Cigarettes, alcohol, gambling…”

Three examples often sound more complete and memorable than two.

Rhetorical Questions

Rhetorical questions can also help engage the audience and encourage them to think actively about the issue.

Key Message

Be sure to integrate your key message early within the speech and continue to sprinkle it throughout the presentation.

This is the core takeaway that you ultimately want the audience to remember.

For example:

• Martin Luther King Jr. - “I have a dream”

• Sir Ken Robinson Ted Talk “Schools Kill Creativity'“

• My own speaking work - “Dare to be different”

The ideal key message is:

• Short

• Memorable

• Repeatable

• Emotionally resonant

It may be useful to repeat this key message approximately 5–7 times throughout the presentation, though the emphasis and intonation can vary each time.

Introduction Notes

A few notes from our discussion around the introduction:

You mentioned that we all make choices every day. Choices about what we buy and what we support. You gave a few examples.

Then you spoke about investments in certain areas being easier to assess:

• Cigarettes

• Alcohol

• Gambling

(I'‘m not sure the above are the exact 3)

However, historically, when it comes to human rights abuses and ethical investment, the waters have often been far more muddied and unclear, making it harder for people to make informed decisions.

That concept creates a strong pathway into introducing the product and its wider purpose.

Obviously, shape the exact wording into language that feels authentic and natural to you and change it completely to suit your style if desirable.

Final Thoughts

I think you’re going to be excellent at this, and I genuinely believe it has the potential to become a really strong and compelling presentation.

Really trust:

• Your understanding of the product

• The quality of the research

• Your natural sensitivity and sincerity as a communicator

Back the product, and back yourself.

Feedback Report - Session 2

02.06.2026

Positives From The Session

Great job Jonny!

There has already been a noticeable improvement in your visual communication.

Overall, your facial expression was much more positive, and you're beginning to deploy hand gestures more naturally. Your posture also appears far more grounded, with less unnecessary movement taking place.

When you engage in this way, with a positive facial expression and relaxed presence, you come across as charming, approachable, easy to listen to and enjoyable to watch.

It was also encouraging to see a greater variety in your hand gestures. You are beginning to use smaller gestures when communicating specific details and wider gestures when communicating larger concepts, which helps reinforce meaning and keeps the audience visually engaged.

You also started to take your time to find specific words rather than over speaking, and this is the most significant and important progress in your speaking.

Body Language

One area to continue working on is keeping your body language open.

At times, there was some hand wringing and occasional rubbing of the arms, both of which can communicate discomfort or nervousness to an audience.

As discussed, when you're not actively using hand gestures, try allowing your hands to rest naturally with open palms. This helps create a more relaxed and confident appearance.

You can also put hands together, but this should be light, relaxed and without wringing.

With gestures generally, continue focusing on quality rather than quantity, natural purpose and intention as we discussed.

Storytelling & Structure

A key area we're now developing is your ability to tell stories and case studies in a way that creates curiosity and suspense.

This is different from academic writing, where the argument is often presented upfront.

When speaking, particularly in presentations, you want the audience to keep wondering:

"What's coming next?". Suspense, mystery, surprise is what keeps people listening.

Be careful not to reveal the key learning, insight or conclusion too early.

Instead:

• Build towards the point.

• Hold back the main lesson until the end where possible.

• Create curiosity throughout the story.

Remember to include specific details that bring stories to life.

For example, when discussing a case study, avoid staying purely at a high level. If you mention something operating at "street level", help the audience visualise what that actually means. Give them a flavour of the reality, the people, the environment or the situation involved.

Specificity creates engagement and makes points land.

The same principle applies to case studies:

• Introduce the context.

• Share the important facts.

• Build curiosity.

• Then reveal the outcome or learning.

I've attached the story telling structure to out email.

Language & Verbal Delivery

One phrase that appears regularly in your speaking is:

"And in doing so..."

There's nothing wrong with the phrase itself, but because it appears frequently, it's worth broadening your range of transitions.

Alternatives include:

• As a result...

• This led to...

• Therefore...

• For example…

• By deploying this method…

• Consequently...

A greater variety of connecting phrases will help your delivery feel more natural and polished. Also, don’t be frightened of the fullstop. i.e Describe the methodology. New sentence ‘As a result of this research…’ rather than running sentences on too long.

Use of Evidence

A real strength is your ability to draw on evidence, data and research.

Whenever you begin referencing evidence-based material, your credibility increases significantly.

Continue leaning into:

• Research

• Data

• Evidence

• Methodology

These are clearly areas where your expertise shines through.

Q&A Preparation

For the Q&A section, the key focus is developing strong opening responses to common questions.

Examples include:

• "That's a great question."

• "This is actually a complex topic."

• "This is a widely debated subject, but here's our perspective."

• “A lot of people are concerned about… Here’s what we’ve done about it”

• "What I can share on that is..."

• "Could you clarify what you mean by...?"

Prepare some opening frameworks, but remember that every audience will phrase questions differently, so flexibility and improvisation remain important.

Above all, maintain honesty.

If there is something you haven't researched or aren't confident about:

• Speak on the parts you can discuss with confidence - acknowledge your expertise and where this lies.

• Keep your answer concise.

• Offer to follow up.

• Refer them to another expert where appropriate.

People respect integrity and transparency far more than forced certainty.

Biggest Breakthrough

The biggest breakthrough from this session came towards the end when you began taking more time to select your words.

This is a hugely important development.

When speakers rush, they often:

• Trip over words.

• Use unnecessary filler.

• Become less precise.

• Lose authority.

The challenge for you now is to speak more slowly than feels natural.

Take your time.

Pause.

Find the exact word you want to use.

Rather than using nine words to reach a point, aim to use three or four carefully chosen words, or even one.

The more specific and deliberate your language becomes, the more powerful your communication will be. You’re in control, don’t let audience pressure rush you.

This is where we begin moving from simply being knowledgeable to becoming a genuinely compelling speaker.

Looking Ahead

Great stuff Jonny!

Overall, we are seeing steady and encouraging progress in the right direction. Positive results in the video clips. Great when you got passionate and your vocal range opened up, mote of this!

Your visual communication has improved, your body language is becoming more intentional, and your ability to slow down and choose your words carefully is beginning to emerge.

The goal now is to continue building poise, composure and precision in your communication.

Let me know what you'd like to focus on in our session next Tuesday and I'll put together a lesson plan accordingly.